Literary Pixie

By Sammy Ginsberg

Typically we only tend to write book reviews, however, the traditional way of selling books is to host an event at a bookstore to try to get you to buy the book. These events are usually free, therefore the only money made is in buying the book. At the same time, trying to get someone to sit for an hour and listen to you talk about your book is one hour of time (possibly two if we consider driving to the store, parking, and a brief chat after the reading). What value does this one hour talk have for the reader who chooses not to buy the book? Is it even worth going to? Given that the event is free, by economic measurements – attending this event has no value. The value is negative, in that you are going to an event where someone is trying to sell you something. Perhaps you buy the book, maybe you don’t. If you don’t buy the book, then financially, this was “a waste of time”. The bookstore made no money, the author made no money, and you spent an hour listening to an author talk about a book that you didn’t want to buy.

I find this method of selling books extremely outdated. I’ve seen a few artists invigorate the book reading to the 21st century – at Linda Ravenwood‘s launch party for A Poem is a House that took place at Skylight as well as Derrick Brown‘s launch party for Love Ends in a Tandem Kayak. At Linda’s she had her friends write poems inspired by poems in the collection specifically for the event, and then read a few poems in the book. Derrick created a one-man performance with humor and storytelling and music embedding poems from the collection into a theatrical experience. I felt inspired!

I’ve always dreamed of being a literary journalist and to document what happens at these readings. Given that I did my dissertation on the 6 Poet at 6 Gallery Reading where Philip Lamantia, Michael McClure, Allen Ginsberg, Gary Snyder, and Phil Whalen read hosted by Kenneth Rexroth in 1955. This event became historical and has been reenacted regularly as this was where Allen Ginsberg first read “Howl”, where Lawrence Ferlinghetti of City Lights Press offered to publish Ginsberg’s first collection which was eventually censored – the bookseller arrested! – and put on trial. This event was also documented in Dharma Bums by Jack Kerouac as well as in the New York Times.

Anywho that was me nerding out a bit, but that’s why I am obsessed with the potential of the live event, foreshadowing my journey from working at the French Open and the Teen Choice Awards, to arts publicity, to teaching.

And I don’t really think of myself as a journalist, because a journalist is all about being objective – and this is my personal blog. I don’t pretend to be objective here. This is my space, my perspective, my observations.

A couple days ago, I saw that Melissa Febos and Maggie Nelson were speaking for FREE at Skylight, and I had to be there. I had originally planned to go to the Kaveh Akbar and Maggie Nelson event on January 13 (My birthday!), but it was canceled because of the fires. Thus, I had to attend.

The format was tradition with a short reading to start (a bit from the beginning, middle, and end) and then a Q and A hosted by Maggie.

What was shared was rich and inspiring, and so I quickly started to take notes. Here are some highlights from the chat.

The largest message was to break the myth that writing a memoir is a selfish act.

Melissa Febos stated, “[Memoir writing is] bringing me into greater connection with the world”. She shared, “Writing is like dreaming, it allows the subconscious to speak,” and it is through letting the unconscious speak that the truth is revealed.

She said that she often turns to writing to make sense of her experience, a form of intellectualization of her problems and anxiety. She shared, “Intellectually and aesthetically figuring it out is like a puzzle, the art making, but when I am applying that apparatus to my own experience it just inevitably leads to the emotions.”

She said that it is like the universe or some higher power is whispering to her, “Make her a little world puzzle and the prize is she gets to feel her feelings”.

She said through writing memoir you are forced to look at what you want to avoid, that writing serves a “dual purpose, avoiding the emotions I had described and processing it”.

She said by doing this work alone, it has helped her immensely in relationships. In healthy relationships, everything one does is a choice. You choose to love someone, one does not fall into love like a compulsion without any control.

Maggie asked good questions, and while Melissa tried to engage in more of a discussion, Maggie kept it centered on Melissa and allowed her to shine and share her insight.

Maggie Nelson did drop this gem:

Writing about the pathetic can be it’s own kink.

I also loved this moment:

Maggie: Should we go on a sex strike? 

Melissa: I could have blamed patriarchy for everything and been righteous, but the problem is how to get free. I’m gonna make a different choice and call that freedom

Another great quote from Melissa

Need to use our words and can’t rip open our chest to allow the divine matrix outside of us.

At the end, a brilliant lively question was asked. A person shared about how she sees herself in lineage with Toni Morrison, and how to keep going when things are so hard and current events are so challenging.

Melissa shared that she uses lots of different tools, and harm reducing spiritual practices such as writing and mutual aid. She shared that she has to use these tools and consciously make different choices because if she goes “back to the factory settings, [she is] set up to self destruct”.”

I love this idea, of factory settings. These behaviors that we learned in childhood that are really not working anymore, that we have to unlearn, that we have to consciously take responsibility for and make new choices in order to be free.

Overall, this was an inspiring event with some real drips of wisdom dropped. I was glad I went.

I wanted to buy the book The Dry Season, but I am in a phase where I am dipping into the emergency fund and can’t buy more books until I make a financial plan and a budget.

As you know, I have been writing memoir too (check out my blooks!). I found this event incredibly validating and reassuring, as well as encouraging to learn how to teach memoir as a high school English teacher and at senior homes, as well as to read up on narrative medicine and narrative therapy.